While there are many resons why athltes don't listen to coaches most issues can be explained by these 2 reasons:
1. Subjective Communication
2. Telling athles what to do comes BEFORE they actually do it (also known as an antecedent)
Have you ever gone to get your hair done, told the stylist or barber exactly what you wanted… and then after the haircut, it looks nothing like what you asked for?
There’s a reason for that.
Humans operate based on their own experiences. What that means is “keep it long on top and short on the sides” means something completely different to you than it does to someone else—or even your stylist.
For example, when I say “keep it long,” to me that might mean 3–5 inches on top. But to the stylist, that could mean 2–3 inches.
Same words—different meanings.
The reason this example matters is because coaches LOVE using subjective language in practices and games.
You hear things like:
- “Work hard”
- “Do better”
- “Be better”
- “We can’t have that”
- “They wanted it more than us”
- “Show some grit”
The problem with these statements is that they’re subjective. They mean different things to different people.
If you asked 10 people what “work hard” means, you’d probably get 10 different answers.
And when coaches use this type of language to guide practice, athletes often end up doing something completely different than what the coach actually wants.
For example, if you tell your athletes to “work hard,” you might see:
- One athlete running faster
- Another diving on the floor
- Another taking a shot every time they get the ball
Everyone is doing something—but not necessarily the right thing.
That’s the problem.
I’m not saying subjective language is bad, but it is definitely a contributing factor when athletes don’t follow instructions the way coaches expect.
To fix this, coaches need to use more objective language.
In other words, tell your athletes exactly what to do and when to do it.
Ask yourself: what behaviors actually define “working hard”?
1. Asking questions
2. Shoing up to practice on time
3. Sprinting back on defense
4.Communicating with teammates
When you define the behaviors, you remove the guesswork.If you want your athletes to truly listen and execute, it starts with turning your subjective language into objective instructions.
Have you ever asked someone to do something… and they just didn’t do it?
Well, there’s a reason for that.
In behavioral science, telling someone what to do is called an antecedent. In other words, it’s something that comes before the behavior actually happens.
Why is this important?
Because antecedents only control human behavior about 5–10% of the time. The things that happen after the behavior control what we do by about 90–95%.
Here’s an example:
You tell a kid, “Don’t put your hand on the hot stove.”
They do it anyway… and get burned.
What is going to control that kid’s behavior in the future?
You telling them “don’t do it”… or the burn?
It’s the burn.
The consequence is what drives future behavior.
This is exactly what happens in coaching.
When coaches tell their athletes what to do and don’t get the result they want, they tend to just keep telling them more… and more… and more.
Unfortunately, this is a very ineffective way to get athletes to perform.
More input does NOT equal more output.
So what can you do?
Giving instruction and telling your athletes what to do is still necessary—it will always be part of coaching. But it can’t stop there.
Telling your athletes what to do needs to be paired with:
- Demonstration
- Practice
- Proper feedbac AND reinforcement when the athlete does something correctly
That is the recipe for getting your athletes to do the things you ask.